Can you love your gay child and disapprove of what they do?

Can you love someone while disapproving of what they do? In our morally confused times many folks think not. They think that we must simply accept anything; not to do so means we are unloving or intolerant. And governments have bought this contorted moral reasoning as well.

But this is a recipe for disaster, and we had better get such matters sorted out before we cause even more damage. Let me tie this in to a common question. I am often asked what I would do if one of my children were caught out in some obvious sinful behaviour or lifestyle. The homosexual activists especially like to throw this one out: ‘What would you do if your child came out as a homosexual?’

They seem to think that this is a conversation stopper, and that they have nicely cornered me. Well no, it is not the end of the conversation, and no they have not cornered me. The answer is actually rather simple: I would of course, continue to love my child, even though I would not approve of the course of action they have embarked upon.

Any parent will love their children through thick and sin. It does not matter if they go off into a life of crime or perverse heterosexual promiscuity. A parent will still love his or her own, but need not and should not condone any dangerous, risky or morally wrong behaviours and lifestyles.

So I, of course would continue to love my child, all the while pointing out that the path they are now on is certainly not advised, and certainly not condoned. Indeed, because I love my children so much, I only want what is for their very best. Who would be happy with their children embracing a dangerous and unsafe lifestyle which can take years off their lives?

How is that being loving? If you really love someone you seek the very best for them. You certainly do not just accept whatever path they choose. Especially if you are a Christian, you always want what is best for them, and that means you want God’s best for them.

You do not want them living in open rebellion and defiance of God’s clear word and standard on human sexuality. You will want them to repent and renounce any such sinful lifestyles, and come back to conformity with God’s word and God’s will.

You see, we cannot confuse love with acceptance. Biblical love is willing the highest good for the other; it is not allowing them to wallow in sin and a dead-end lifestyle. I will always love my kids no matter what, but I do not have to accept everything they may choose to do or engage in.

There is nothing loving about allowing any person you love and care for to head off on a destructive and hurtful direction. We dare not accept anything and everything they get themselves into. Yet far too many Christian parents are doing just that.

They think they must accept, embrace and condone anything their children do. That is not at all being a loving parent. That is being an irresponsible and unbiblical parent. That is simply sending their kids to an early grave and a lost eternity.

And our Western governments are no better on this issue. They have in fact gone full circle here. They once prohibited such dangerous lifestyles, but then went to permission, and have now gone all the way to active and zealous promotion.

Yet on other high-risk behaviours it has reversed course. I refer to how governments deal with tobacco use. Once it was open slather, but now the state is cracking down big time. The state is doing everything it can to deter smokers and deter others from taking up smoking.

Thus we now pay outrageous prices for a pack of cigs – this is called a “sin tax”. Astronomically high taxes on tobacco products are there for one reason – besides being a revenue raiser: to discourage folks from smoking or taking it up. And it works.

Smoking rates are now well down from what they were 50 years ago. So why the bizarre double standards here? Why does the West actively endorse and promote one dangerous lifestyle, while actively deterring and discouraging the other?

In fact, we are witnessing a major role-reversal when it comes to this topic. While Russia once was the “evil empire” doing great evil at home and abroad, and America was once the light on a hill and a force for good, remarkably the tables are now turning.