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Showing posts with the label relationship

First New Zealand lesbian ‘marriage’ over already?

New Zealand ’s first same-sex “marriage” is shaping up to become the country’s first same-sex divorce. Less than a year since they became the poster girls for the country’s new legal definition of marriage (last August) the  NZ Herald reports  that Melissa Ray , a former Ferns football player, and Natasha Vitali, a sales rep, are “believed to have split”. The main source of the story appears to be Ms Vitali’s Facebook page on which the following poem appeared yesterday: Drink it down, laugh it off, Avoid the drama, take chances, And never have regrets,  Because at one point everything you did,  Was exactly what you wanted. When the  Herald  contacted her Ms Vitali said: "It's not anyone's business, we'll just leave it at that, but thank you for calling.” And, “I'm not talking to you about my private life, we got enough coverage when we got married." It is well known that female partnerships break up more often than male – twice as much, acco...

Same-sex ‘marriage’ also fails the kinship test

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The procreation and care of children play a central role in the current debates over the meaning of marriage. For supporters of the conjugal view of marriage, children are the dominant reality driving the state’s recognition of marriage. Because sex leads to babies, the state wants to channel sex into a stable relationship that bonds both a mother and a father to their children. Those two parents, the mom and the dad, are then present from birth through their child’s emergence into adulthood as a constant source of love, education, and provision. As the social science presented at  Public Discourse  and  else where  has documented, a married mom and dad provide the best possible home for raising their children. And so the state recognizes, supports, and promotes marriages—for the sake of the children. Making children the integral attribute of marriage has shaped the legal and political debate over marriage, and it has led to several obvious objections from those...

Women see cohabitation as a step toward marriage . . . men a relationship test or a commitment postponement

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 Twelve years ago, half of the twenty-somethings surveyed by the National Marriage Project agreed with the statement “You would only marry someone if he or she agreed to live together with you first, so that you could find out whether you really get along.” Their reasoning was simple: “Moving in together before marriage was a good way to avoid divorce .” Since then, the percentage agreeing with the statement has probably increased. But what has not increased is the correctness of that justification for cohabitation. Because it was wrong then, and it is just as wrong now, as a New York Times opinion piece points out. You heard me correctly: the New York Times . In a piece entitled “The Downside of Cohabitating Before Marriage,” psychologist Meg Jay of the University of Virginia describes what is known as the “cohabitation effect”: “Couples who cohabit before marriage . . . tend to be less satisfied with their marriages—and more likely to divorce—than couples who do not...

Homosexual Marriage and Child Sacrifices

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Gay Couple with child (Photo credit: Wikipedia ) Government needs to get marriage policy right, because it shapes the norms associated with this most fundamental relationship. Redefining marriage would abandon the norm of male-female sexual complementarity as an essential characteristic of marriage. Making that optional would also make other essential characteristics—like monogamy, exclusivity and permanency—optional. ... increasingly confirmed by the rhetoric and arguments of those who would redefine marriage (“revisionists”) and by the policies that their more candid leaders increasingly embrace ... These are the words of leading supporters of same-sex marriage . If you believe in monogamy and exclusivity—and the benefits these bring to orderly procreation and child well-being—but would redefine civil marriage , take note. Some revisionists say marriage is simply whatever sort of interpersonal relationship consenting adults—be they two or 10 in number—want it to be; sexual...

Homosexuality is a relationship problem

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English: A young woman and man embracing while outdoors. (Photo credit: Wikipedia ) From Isolation to Relationship to Intimacy by Alan Medinger Homosexuality is a relationship problem. Our relationship with Jesus Christ comes first in our healing, but close behind it comes our need to learn to relate to other same-sex people in healthy ways. We must identify the obstacles that have kept us from healthy relationships, and learn to distinguish between friendships and intimate relationships. Then we must realize how we need them both. If Dr. Bill Consiglio is right, and homosexuality often starts with low self-esteem, then it is likely that many homosexual people, because they believe there is little about them that is either interesting or desirable to others, are likely to be isolated people . If Elizabeth Moberly is right and a critical element in the development of homosexuality is withdrawal from the same-sex parent -- what she calls defensive detachment -- then many homos...

C.S. Lewis and how the acceptance of gay sex leads to the eradication of friendship

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Cover of C.S. Lewis June 13, 2012 (LifeSiteNews.com) - When close friends are presented in film or literature today, the conclusion is often: ‘Oh, they are gay.’ One of the tragedies of our culture, in its vigorous acceptance of the homosexual agenda, is the corrosion of a true understanding of friendship. What is ‘ Friendship ’? Have we lost our concept of it? Today, Friendship is considered either mere casual companionship, or, if it is something deeper, a latent sexual urge . But traditionally, Friendship was neither of these things. In  The Four Loves , novelist and philosopher C. S. Lewis describes Friendship as a love in its own right, as great as Eros ( romantic love ), but entirely  separate  from it. “Those who cannot conceive Friendship as a substantive love, but only as a disguise or elaboration of Eros, betray the fact that they have never had a Friend,” Lewis declares. Friendship is founded on the vital question: “ Do you see the same truth?...

Biblical Marriage is a mystery

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The marriage (detail of bride and ladies) (Photo credit: Wikipedia ) Many, perhaps most, couples will be entering their marriages with expectations that are inconsistent to reality. It is only a matter of time when reality catches up to their relationship. Houses do not long stand when their foundations are gone. This much can be assured in marriage - in time the winds will come and the water will rise. Only those marriages with a firm foundation based on reality will survive. This becomes abundantly clear when reading the first chapter of Tim and Kathy Keller’s book, The Meaning of Marriage: Facing the Complexities of Commitment with the Wisdom of God . Two things are true about society’s attitudes toward marriage. First is a growing skepticism over the validity of the institution of marriage . The Pew Research Center found in 2010 that nearly 40 percent of Americans believe that marriage is becoming obsolete . And many, particularly the young, are acting accordingly. There ...