The homosexual Marriage argument goes like this...
Don't like gay marriage? Don't get one. My gay marriage doesn't change anything about your straight marriage. We're not altering the definition of marriage; we're expanding it. These new rights don't take away yours. So don't try to deny them to us.
The startling rise in public approval for gay marriage depends on such simple appeals to intuition. Look at all these happy gay couples. Why not invite them to join the party and get married? It's not like straight couples have done such a good job of commending the institution. Besides, what consenting adults do in the privacy of their bedrooms is their business alone.
To our highly individualistic Western culture, only libertarian arguments make any sense, even to many Christians. Personally we might say homosexuality is a sin; but what right do we have to impose our values on anyone else? If they aren't harming anyone else, then who can deny their gay marriages equal protection under the law?
You need not claim Christian faith to understand what's at stake in the debate over gay marriage. Harvard University professor of government Michael J. Sandel, writing in his bestselling book Justice: What's the Right Thing to Do, questions whether we can welcome gay marriage on purely libertarian, nonjudgmental criteria.
"In order to decide who should qualify for marriage, we have to think through the purpose of marriage and the virtues it honors," Sandel writes. "And this carries us onto contested moral terrain, where we can't remain neutral toward competing conceptions of the good life."
To be sure, every Christian will be forced to choose sides. And we'll need the courage to stand by God's vision for marriage. So when asked about the purpose of marriage, our vision of the good life, let us point to Genesis 2:24, cited in Ephesians 5:31: "Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh." In Ephesians 5:32, the apostle Paul explains, "This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church." So for all the other good purposes of marriage—affection, support, stability, child-rearing, among them—ultimately Christian marriage points to the gospel.
The startling rise in public approval for gay marriage depends on such simple appeals to intuition. Look at all these happy gay couples. Why not invite them to join the party and get married? It's not like straight couples have done such a good job of commending the institution. Besides, what consenting adults do in the privacy of their bedrooms is their business alone.
To our highly individualistic Western culture, only libertarian arguments make any sense, even to many Christians. Personally we might say homosexuality is a sin; but what right do we have to impose our values on anyone else? If they aren't harming anyone else, then who can deny their gay marriages equal protection under the law?
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You need not claim Christian faith to understand what's at stake in the debate over gay marriage. Harvard University professor of government Michael J. Sandel, writing in his bestselling book Justice: What's the Right Thing to Do, questions whether we can welcome gay marriage on purely libertarian, nonjudgmental criteria.
"In order to decide who should qualify for marriage, we have to think through the purpose of marriage and the virtues it honors," Sandel writes. "And this carries us onto contested moral terrain, where we can't remain neutral toward competing conceptions of the good life."
To be sure, every Christian will be forced to choose sides. And we'll need the courage to stand by God's vision for marriage. So when asked about the purpose of marriage, our vision of the good life, let us point to Genesis 2:24, cited in Ephesians 5:31: "Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh." In Ephesians 5:32, the apostle Paul explains, "This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church." So for all the other good purposes of marriage—affection, support, stability, child-rearing, among them—ultimately Christian marriage points to the gospel.
Specifically, Christian marriage reflects God as husbands love their wives "as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word" (Eph. 5:25).
Few children today will grow up and see this love in action. Nearly half have parents who aren't even married. So we cannot be surprised they have little idea what marriage should be. Yet we respond with hope that when they meet a Christian couple, they see the difference and hear the hope of the gospel. Broken homes are a mission field. They call us first to compassion, not judgment.
As we embrace this commission, we recognize that quoting Ephesians 5 won't do us much good in public arguments over the government's definition of marriage.
Few children today will grow up and see this love in action. Nearly half have parents who aren't even married. So we cannot be surprised they have little idea what marriage should be. Yet we respond with hope that when they meet a Christian couple, they see the difference and hear the hope of the gospel. Broken homes are a mission field. They call us first to compassion, not judgment.
As we embrace this commission, we recognize that quoting Ephesians 5 won't do us much good in public arguments over the government's definition of marriage.
So we return to Sandel: what is marriage for? What is the purpose? Hall, the Episcopal priest, argues that marriage is a "kind of free coming-together of two people to live out their lives." Using Mundy's description, we see marriage as a negotiated arrangement between two people looking to support one another for a time and not exclusively. Shared responsibilities, divided evenly, relieve some of life's burdens.
Without even citing the explicit example of Christ's sacrifice for the church, we can still argue that marriage requires far more of ourselves than the new definitions betray. Love demands 100 percent of each partner. Marriage based on needs and affection will struggle to endure when the needs change and the affection fades.
When we lost the permanence of marriage, we lost the purpose. And now, as we lose the transcendence, we lose the transformative power of union. Any two people can partner together for support in childcare, housecleaning, finances, and sex. But it takes a true marriage to turn two into one all-giving whole.
Without even citing the explicit example of Christ's sacrifice for the church, we can still argue that marriage requires far more of ourselves than the new definitions betray. Love demands 100 percent of each partner. Marriage based on needs and affection will struggle to endure when the needs change and the affection fades.
When we lost the permanence of marriage, we lost the purpose. And now, as we lose the transcendence, we lose the transformative power of union. Any two people can partner together for support in childcare, housecleaning, finances, and sex. But it takes a true marriage to turn two into one all-giving whole.
