Jesus, Homosexuality and being Single
Matthew 19:10–12 “There are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Let the one who is able to receive this receive it” (v. 12).
Our verse is not talking about transgender people. Jesus excludes all an any other form of marriage apart from heterosexual marriage. People were or became eunuchs for three reasons (see below).
Our verse is not talking about transgender people. Jesus excludes all an any other form of marriage apart from heterosexual marriage. People were or became eunuchs for three reasons (see below).
Christ’s appeal to creation and His restrictions on the lawful grounds for divorce (Matt. 19:1–9) rebuke any desire to find loopholes in the marriage laws in order to escape unions that sinners find unfulfilling. Marriage is to be cherished wholeheartedly, not to be dispensed with as we futilely attempt to find “happiness” outside of God’s gracious law. Husbands and wives are called to obey the Lord together and work tirelessly to become one flesh physically, emotionally, and spiritually by guarding and renewing their relationship (Gen. 2:24–25). Christ acknowledges heterosexual marriage only.
The disciples misunderstand the inherent worthiness of holy matrimony, believing marriage to be appealing only if liberal provision is made for divorce and remarriage.
When they say, “If such is the case…it is better not to marry” (Matt. 19:10), they really mean, “If these words are true, Jesus, we are better off unmarried than to find ourselves in a dissatisfying marriage that does not meet your criteria for a just divorce.”
Christ does not deny the truth of this response entirely, confirming that
singleness can be desirable (vv. 11–12). However, He disagrees with His
followers that the potential for imperfect marriages makes singleness a better
alternative. Instead, singleness is preferable only when those who have been
given the gift of celibacy exercise this gift for the kingdom. Marriage, Jesus
implies, is the norm for most of God’s people and is not in itself inferior to
lifelong singleness. Singleness is better than marriage only for those to whom
God has given the gift of celibacy (1 Cor. 7). Thus, as John Calvin wrote,
“God gives [the gift of singleness and celibacy] to whom he chooses…it is
folly in any man to choose to live unmarried, when he has not received this
special gift.”
All marriages in this fallen world have bad days, but we should not discourage
marriage or seek divorce frivolously. Marriage offers kingdom opportunities,
like the discipleship of children, that are generally unavailable to single
people. At the same time, single people can more easily do kingdom work in
foreign lands or other tasks that keep them away from home. Neither marriage
nor singleness are inherently superior; both vocations can serve the Lord.
Single believers like Daniel and Paul as well as married believers such as
Abraham and Peter have been used mightily of the Lord to advance His purposes.
Knowing this to be true, our churches should be places where both singles and
married couples are equally valued and given opportunities to serve in the
congregation. If you serve as a leader in your church, do what you can to
encourage both married couples and singles to take part in ministry.
Three groups of “eunuchs” (εὐνοῦχοι; the word occurs only here and in Acts 8 in the NT) are mentioned here, two literal and one metaphorical. Among literal eunuchs are those born thus (the impotent) and those made thus by others (those castrated for certain high positions in a royal court; cf. the Ethiopian eunuch of Acts 8:27). Such literal eunuchs were not allowed in the assembly of the people according to Deut 23:1 (cf. m Yebam. 8:4–6 and 6:6). A third group of “eunuchs” are those who figuratively are said to have “made themselves eunuchs” (εὐνούχισαν ἑαυτούς; the verb occurs only in this verse in the NT) “for the sake of the kingdom of heaven” (διὰ τὴν βασιλείαν τῶν οὐρανῶν; for this expression see Comment on 3:21).
The disciples misunderstand the inherent worthiness of holy matrimony, believing marriage to be appealing only if liberal provision is made for divorce and remarriage.
When they say, “If such is the case…it is better not to marry” (Matt. 19:10), they really mean, “If these words are true, Jesus, we are better off unmarried than to find ourselves in a dissatisfying marriage that does not meet your criteria for a just divorce.”
Christ does not deny the truth of this response entirely, confirming that
singleness can be desirable (vv. 11–12). However, He disagrees with His
followers that the potential for imperfect marriages makes singleness a better
alternative. Instead, singleness is preferable only when those who have been
given the gift of celibacy exercise this gift for the kingdom. Marriage, Jesus
implies, is the norm for most of God’s people and is not in itself inferior to
lifelong singleness. Singleness is better than marriage only for those to whom
God has given the gift of celibacy (1 Cor. 7). Thus, as John Calvin wrote,
“God gives [the gift of singleness and celibacy] to whom he chooses…it is
folly in any man to choose to live unmarried, when he has not received this
special gift.”
All marriages in this fallen world have bad days, but we should not discourage
marriage or seek divorce frivolously. Marriage offers kingdom opportunities,
like the discipleship of children, that are generally unavailable to single
people. At the same time, single people can more easily do kingdom work in
foreign lands or other tasks that keep them away from home. Neither marriage
nor singleness are inherently superior; both vocations can serve the Lord.
Single believers like Daniel and Paul as well as married believers such as
Abraham and Peter have been used mightily of the Lord to advance His purposes.
Knowing this to be true, our churches should be places where both singles and
married couples are equally valued and given opportunities to serve in the
congregation. If you serve as a leader in your church, do what you can to
encourage both married couples and singles to take part in ministry.
Three groups of “eunuchs” (εὐνοῦχοι; the word occurs only here and in Acts 8 in the NT) are mentioned here, two literal and one metaphorical. Among literal eunuchs are those born thus (the impotent) and those made thus by others (those castrated for certain high positions in a royal court; cf. the Ethiopian eunuch of Acts 8:27). Such literal eunuchs were not allowed in the assembly of the people according to Deut 23:1 (cf. m Yebam. 8:4–6 and 6:6). A third group of “eunuchs” are those who figuratively are said to have “made themselves eunuchs” (εὐνούχισαν ἑαυτούς; the verb occurs only in this verse in the NT) “for the sake of the kingdom of heaven” (διὰ τὴν βασιλείαν τῶν οὐρανῶν; for this expression see Comment on 3:21).
The latter phrase is to be understood in the sense of those who have renounced marriage (such as John the Baptist and Jesus himself) to give priority to the work of the kingdom (cf. 1 Cor 7:32–34) and not to the requirement of sexual continence on the part of those who have been divorced (as claimed by Dupont, Moloney; cf. Gundry) or who have renounced their wives (thus Côté).
The kingdom thus can take priority over the interpretation of Gen 1:28 as the obligation to marry and to have children. If Jesus, like John the Baptist and Paul (cf. 1 Cor 7:29, 31), expected the imminent end of the age, the idea of celibacy would take on a less objectionable aspect. ὁ δυνάμενος χωρεῖν, “the one who is able to accept (it),” is the one to whom God grants (v. 11) the ability to accept non-marriage. Two alternatives thus lie open to the disciples of Jesus: marriage without the option of divorce (cf. v. 6, stated absolutely; v. 9, with the added exception clause; cf. 1 Cor 7:39) or celibacy for the cause of the kingdom
